One of the Innovations Corporation's infamous products
has today caused a fatality.
The Super Trolley Roadster which is a motorised supermarket
trolley capable of much faster speeds than a standard metal cage on wheels
today collided with an Old Age Pensioner who died instantly. The trolleys
are capable of speeds up to and including 30 MPH and features frontal bull
bars and a powerful interior. The incident occurred in a crowded supermarket
in the biscuit aisle of the Mold branch of Tesco's. It's owner allegedly
leant on the "wrong button" when the trolley careered out of control and
riproared up the aisle. Several shoppers were knocked unconscious and tons
of shopping was completely destroyed before it hit an 81 year old woman
at the end of the aisle. Police say the trolley was travelling near 30
MPH as it hit the woman. Eyewitnesses saw the woman's body leap into the
air and thud down on a till. A nearby security guard took a shot at the
trolley's engine to stop it's killer rampage. Pieces of metal and spots
of petrol rained down across Tesco's. Spokespersons of the Innovations
Corp were unavailable to comment except to say "the super trolley roadster
makes shopping a trip worth while. The coolest new innovation of 2001,
get one today!".